In Spirit

It seems from youth to death there is a 'ok, let it be' kinda feeling inherit to humans that grows from 'fuck it', to 'i have no other option than to accept it and i am fine with it'. I have a feeling death will bring something bad. Otherwise, why should we go from young, strong and unwilling to weak and accepting? It's like life is a kind of beating that shapes you into accepting everything around you, until you finally die. And what? Heaven? Goodness? After a life of beating? The point? Growing as a spirit? Where's the spirit in our world today? Why not nurture a growing spirit instead of showing horrors and scaring? The devil is out there and it's playing you. "It's funnily playing puppetry with the Christians in the church." - this reminds me of a kinda childish-marilyn manson lyric.

To bring up a topic i though about the other day but didn't write down, i think there is no more exterior spirit; it died. It died when Man was born, when conscious appeared. What other reason is there for constant need of progress? Of physical progress? We have always and still are abandoning the idea of spirit. Perhaps, we never possessed it at all from the moment consciousness appeared. Since ancient time Man has built. Along with believed, but obviously the building has gained more points. I mean, even hardcore spirituals turn to warmongers.

God died when Man was born.

And genetically we know this. We take less and less into account the spiritual. Ages ago there was Gods for everything. Today, not so much. The so called "spiritual people" are hopeless humans fighting for something that cannot be. I know spiritual people that are more interested in physical comfort than spiritual achievement. But in the end, we are all the same, because we all look for physical comfort, before spiritual comfort is searched. Again, a dead cause.

Whenever i feel like this, i recollect a movie by Steven Spielberg i think, where there was this planet just with water and a high race of beings; i think it was one of the first episodes of Star Wars. I always remember these beings, and i wish that Humans where walking towards being like them. That's what gets me through these thoughts.

But, i am fighting towards spiritual achievement now, the same fight i said was impossible to win. Such strong spiritual feeling. It comes up when all your hopes are down. I believe we are alone.

Christianity is a beautiful waste of time.
Buddhism is a fun waste of time.
Hinduism is a skeptical waste of time.

I'm sure all religions are specific.

And i'm sure they help people remember what others felt; the spiritual calling.

Again i remember that i have realized this before.